It's funny, because again your not here when I need you.

Ignore the problem and it goes away, right? Oh, dear.

How wrong.

Oh here she goes again, away. It seems my only big mistake. I thought the words would come alive, I am your maybe, watch tonight.

I prayed for ways to make the day. I am still here, but not the same. I know it now, you're leaving this friend, defense. There she goes. There she runs

What's become, of the person you used to be? You were the only person like me. But now she's disappeared.

Don't stop, don't go, for you are sleeping, tossing. And inch, by inch, you fade away, you are running to your grave. In your career, you are so anti-clear. You can't admit that you don't fit where you're not fitting in.

There she goes, there she runs, What's become, of the person you used to be? You were the only person like me.

But now she's disappeared.

When will it end? When will this god-damned, fuckin pain end? I can't take this anymore, it's like someody curbed stomped my chest. I ache, all the time. Every smile I make, i hurt more. I want to be happy, but it's such a farfetched fantasy at this point.

I needed someone today, and when I turned to look, there was no one. Did I scare everyone away? I was trying to help to scare their wolves away, but I guess they followed suit with them.

I'm not alone,

No, Whore, I'm deffintly, not alone,

I'm just on my own.

I'm such a fucking hypocrite. Hah.

I don't want to be part of the problem
I try so hard to get roughed up
Fists on up, it looks that easy
It looks that way to me
It looks that way to you
But then there's you telling me I can
Then there's you screaming say something
I want the ocean right now
I want the ocean right now
I get so jealous that I can't even work
There I am in the morning
I don't like what I see
I don't know how it's become such a problem
Keep you up all night if I try to remain calm
How can they ask why I feel so angry
Do you see my problem if I never explain it
But then there's you asking me how long
Say something, it's taken me so long

I know you probably won't read this anyways, but i don't care.

I'm sorry, that last entry was uncalled for, but without it, you wouldn't have felt what it's like to be me. You wouldn't have felt what it's like to feel how you make me feel.

Did you know, your what makes me hurt the most? You always think it's him, but he makes me happy. I don't want you back, I have no feelings for you anymore, you've made me dead. You won't ever appologize. But whatever, i'm done. You make me hurt to much, i dont want the pain anymore.

I hope your fucking happy.

HAH!

Oh the bloody irony!

I'm always there for you, when you need me. But when I need you,, your nowhere to be found! (Of corse I know where the fuck you are. You broadcast it like the evening news) Did you honestly think I'd keep this one locked in my head?

No
Way
In
Hell
Sugar.

So tell me, when your with them, is it like being with me? Or do your forget that? Do your "forget" me. Hah.

I bet you don't.

Do I sound bitter?
Do I sound cold?
Do I sound spiteful?

Oh sugar, I am.

You tell me everythongs better, but that was a lie wasn't it? In my life, right now, I need a stable relation ship. Meaning, I don''t have to walk eggshells around you to make ure your not pissed off at me the next day. You out of anyone should know I don't have one of those with anyone. You out of everyone shoulda offered one.

But I don't care anymore. I've reached the breaking point. It doesn't hurt, it doesn't faze me. I don't feel it, I don't feel anything. I'm hallow, so go ahead, yell at me for this. Mske me feel bad, your only hurting yourself.

And by the way, thanks for ignoring me. Thank's for ignoring everything I told you. Thank you for leaving me out of the picture.

Or

Would you like me to lie to make you happy? Would you like me to talk about how Happy and how lucky you are. Would you? Because if it actually will get you to talk to me, and not leave me on the back burner, then I will.

If he's your everything, then that leaves me as nothing. Thanks again.

And don't worry, if you say you hate me and never want to talk to me, that's fine.

I hope your happy with a dope feind.


xx Kar-lee

Oh, Whore.

Finally a place and time I can talk about my feelings, and not everybody elses. Finally a time that they matter.

Hah

They'll never matter.

This is fucked up, no, this is *beyond* fucked up. It's si fucked up, it's looping back to normal. Maybe it's karma, though I tried my best to stay on the good side. This time I swear it's not my fault.